February 2, 2009

*I will not write a whiny post, I will not write a whiny post*

*I will not write a whiny post, I will not write a whiny post* I hate February. *I will not write a whiny post, I will not write a whiny post* I know it's stupid to hate a month. It's not like February ever did anything to me (well not directly), so why do I hate it? I just do! It's just a dumb month. *I will not write a whiny post, I will not write a whiny post* I'm sick. My dad just walked into my office, felt my forehead (because I've been whining all morning), and said "holy crap you're sick". Gee, dad ya think? Then he said "then why'd you come in today?" Then after I mentally punched him in the face I reminded him that he called my mother this morning so that she could, and I quote, "harass" me until I went to work, even though this morning at whatever ungodly hour my dad walked into my room and said "Ashley are you coming in to work?", while I ignored him hoping that I was just dreaming a very bad dream and that in reality it was still three am and I could sleep for a few more hours, I mumbled something along the lines of "go away because I hate the world and it hates me and I'm fairly certain that if I hear anything about a ground hog today I'm gonna shoot it and make ground hog burgers for dinner, not to mention that I'm a lonely old hag, who's mother called her a loser yesterday ( and I don't care if you were joking), with a zit the size of Montana on the tip of my nose which hurts like a mother by the way and makes it very hard for me to wipe my nose, which is running like a refrigerator, thankyouverymuch and goodnight." Yet somehow I trudged down here and sat at this computer and answered phones and got called a man, and wanted to poke out my eyes with a toothpick. I'm thinking it's because I'm a living saint. I expect the Pope to come around any day now. *I will not write a whiny post, I will not write a whiny post*
*I will not write a whiny post, I will not write a whiny post*
The Good:
  • My fingers are nicely calloused after this weeks power guitar playing.
  • My toenails are finally painted
  • I had yummy fresh organic chicken noodle soup for lunch
  • I went to Disneyland yesterday and my brothers managed to piss off half the people in line for space mountain which was actually hilarious.
  • My hair is pretty co-operative today
  • I am listening to the Kings of Leon, which makes me happy and I don't care what you think they are amazing and Sex on Fire is possibly the best song ever written, in my ever humble opinion and it just came on.
  • The sky is very beautifully blue today
  • My new shoes should be arriving in the mail today along with some presents I bought for friends!
  • My dad finally admitted to and apologized for the lameness that is my name.

The Bad:

  • @*!7$@$*$@(@$(!@$*)*!@$^&%#*%! <------ You really don't want to know what this is about, because it would lead to a horribly depressing post filled with tears and whining *I will not write a whiny post, I will not write a whiny post*
  • It's 75 on February 2nd
  • My head feels like a balloon and my throat is practicing for an audition for sandpaper. I'm pretty sure it'll get the part.
  • I am highly annoyed with dorks who are happy with being in their dorkish ways. Grr.
  • I'm not a loser mom, thankyouverymuch
  • Speaking of dorks why is it that they seem to have wonderfully perfect lives?
  • What exactly is the point of valentines day?
  • How is it that I manage to always be the babysitter on said day of valentine whilst my parents plan to go cavorting around Portland for the weekend, and my sister plans on going cavorting around San Diego for the weekend? Speaking of this does anyone know where I can take a 16 yr old, an almost 14 yr old, an almost 12, yr old, a 9, yr old and a 3 yr old, that doesn't involve my brain dying or anything having to do with lovey-doveyness? I'd be much obliged to suggestions. *I will not write a whiny post, I will not write a whiny post*
  • It is highly depressing to listen to people play the guitar and know that I will never be that good dammit. *I will not write a whiny post, I will not write a whiny post*
Crap always happens in February and I always feel horribly gloomy. But I am determined to keep up my spirits this year. After all it's on 28 days, and I'm down to 26 by now. I can handle this:


1. I will not become angry at extended family. Mostly only because no extended family is coming to visit this year. See silver lining number one.


2. I will not gripe about how the ground hog predicted six more weeks of winter, yet it's 75 degrees here. I will not gripe, I will not gripe. *I will not write a whiny post, I will not write a whiny post*


3. I will not sink into the "February Gloom" and will continue to strive towards my goals.


4. I will ignore Valentines day. Don't get me started, cuz I'm in a bad mood, and I really hate valentines day.


5. I will go to the beach on said day of valentine and I will surf with my siblings and not think of anything else, because I am yet again stuck with the kids this year.

6. I will stop being in a crappy mood. *I will not write a whiny post, I will not write a whiny post*


7. I will not eat chocolate. As soon as I'm done with the chocolate chip cookie.

8. I will eat more cheese. Preferably provolone or whatever it is that Chipotle uses.


9. I will learn five more guitar chords on top of the four I already know. I will also make myself practice them for hours everyday.


10. I will just ignore anything that annoys or bothers me by slipping into my own little world full of rainbows and music, and candy canes and roses, and poppies and blue eyes. So there.
I'm going to go drowned myself in tea. Have a lovely day.

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