March 29, 2009

O-side (and an etsy update)

There's an update in my Etsy shop
And here are some pics from Oceanside.
Bri was a bird

Charissa wanted to go for a swim

They attack me for no reason all the time...

Upstart Crow in Seaport Village, San Diego. Best Coffee, Best books. Spent most of my childhood in this place.

A sign in The Upstart Crow

Wooden toys were all I was allowed to have when I was a kid. It was awesome.

Seaport Village pond.

The wooden toy shop I spent my whole childhood in.

Oceanside Pier

Yeah I don't know...



My fish had fins! We made it into a man.

Charissa thinks she's a model...

Best fish and chips this side of the pacific.

Jess couldn't come so we were asians for her.

March 28, 2009

Dear Denny's, I'm so sorry.

I went shopping today and came home with the world's most bad ass headache. I don't know why. I ate, had more caffeine than I should have, I got plenty of sleep, drank lots of water. But nothing helps. This is why I have not posted O-side pics.

In other news I spent 70$ on bras and underwear finally. I hate undies shopping. Mostly cuz I wear a really random bra size and it takes forever to find any. Stupid weight loss messing up my bra mojo.

It's hot. I'm not looking forward to summer. I would very much like a plane/boat/kayak ticket to Antarctica. Actually I've always wanted to go to Antarctica. I like ice. and Penguins. I think we'd get along very nicely. (Me and Antarctica, not the penguins.) Actually I hate kayaks.

I think I'd like to be able to selectively choose who reads my blog (please don't remind me that there is a setting for this, just go with me). Like, I'd like for people to stumble on it and be all "holy cow this chick is hilarious! I want to be her bff, and hope that one day, I too can be as cool as her", and then start reading my blog, but then if I, say, posted a post about someone I happened to run into while shopping and had a really funny story about this person, that would totally hurt/offend/reveal my true feelings about said person. Cuz it's a great story filled with intrigue*, suspense*, revelations about how cool I am, people being frustrated that I was the apple of their child's eye, Home-school moms, stalker tendencies, random shout outs that I did not know about, awkward laughter, and a high A that someone (who was not me but the person in question) hit flat and sharp, which I didn't even know was possible until this happened. Really it's a great story (that Jill might remember, mostly cuz I went on and on about how much it disturbed me), ask me about it sometime. But I'd like to post it here, but if I do that then said person might see it, because said person is a friend on facebook, where my blog is linked and posted in my notes and what if said person one day randomly was all "Oh yeah Ashley! She's the crap! I should totally see what she's writing about and give her another random and awkward shout out that sends everyone into disguised snickers, because Ashley is just such a nice person she didn't have the heart to tell me that was weird, random, and a little creepy, and just played along with lots of thumbs ups" and then she saw this post and was all "holy skunk, she thinks I'm creepy! WTC(what the crap)! She was my idol!" Then she'd send me hate mail and flaming bags of poop and if there is one thing I can't handle it's flaming poop. And then when I run into said person she'd be all hater status and then I'd feel bad, just cuz I wanted to get a laugh on my blog. So this is why I should be allowed to choose which posts people get to read.

In other news we're not going bowling. We're going down to the UV (University Village for those who don't speak UCR (which is University of California Riverside (yes we have a UC school, but no where to hang out, it's awesome!))) to see a showing of Grease in the movie theatre. We are also going to be causing hell at Denny's. Denny's usually runs screaming when we show up because it almost always ends in really loud conversations about bodily functions, or random waiter flirting, or a "let's use all the items on the table and make a sculpture which we will call Denny'shenge", or a sugar packet fight.

My headache is almost gone now. I'm attributing this to the fact that I just drank half a bottle of Mtn. Dew. This is gonna be a fun night. Me and Mtn. Dew don't really mix well. Well we do if you plan on getting arrested, but not for normal quiet evenings.

Oh and there will be an etsy update tomorrow. look for it.
*this is not true.

March 27, 2009

Moving pictures

I love it when you're having a crappy day, and thinking crappy thoughts, and annoyed with the crappy night, and then one little thing changes your whole mood around. Tonight I got dumped babysitting duties, despite the fact that a. no one asked me and just assumed that I was going to be home, and b. that I had plans for a music show that I was really excited for. It cheesed me off, and I was musing (cuz that's what I do) about things that made me rather annoyed, and wrote a song about how depressingly annoyed I was (no worries it's in the "I'll never use this nor let anyone else see if ever" pile of songs) and then my parents left and Fraser begged me to go rent movies when we went to get pizza. So being the amazingly sweet sister that I am I obliged, after I decided that I wanted to rent Quantum of Solice (even though I hate Daniel "I look like a Nazi" Craig (you are no Bond sir, no Bond.)), and that led me on a rabbit trail or thought about Sean Connery (which most my rabbit trails of thought do end there) and I was remembering the movie The League of Extraordinary Gentleman. We rented it a long time ago, and my parents didn't like, it but I loved it, and I was pretty sure my brothers would also. So I went and rented it. Fraser picked out that and Bolt and I also found a movie called Blood and Chocolate which is about a werewolf girl who works in a candy shop (I know! talk about an awesome life!).Well the movie store guy (not Matt the stalker, or Josh the hottie, or shortie the shortie, or mouse boy, but the army dude from Texas(there's also a lesbian and a goth girl who work at our local Blockbuster. I love it(Goth girl is important to the story))) was all talking about movies with me (this happens alot, because I'm always in there, and apparently have great taste in movies) and we were talking about the genre of pseudo sci-fi fantasy goth-ish steampunk mythisim action films and how they really are the best because they combined all the great things about movie genres as well as movie elements and hark back to the point of films which were to be a visual representation of theatrical suspension of disbelief and allowed the audience to forget the real world and slip away into a world of magic, make believe, and fantasy (The semester I spent as a theatre major has proven to be useful in my discussions with movie buffs). Well we ended up talking for like fifteen minutes, bringing in Goth Girl (who sat in front of me at the midnight showing of Twilight btw in her Team Jacob shirt), and mouse boy to discuss the amazingness of movies about Vampires, werewolves (turns out the trilogy of werewolves movies I recorded on Sci-fi are actually really good (they are called Ginger Snaps by the by)), and other mythical creatures, then we discussed how we all though that we should return to having intermissions in movies, because movies such as Twilight would have been much better if they had stayed closer to the books and yes I'd be willing to sit at a four hour movie if there was an intermission, and then we discussed mood music, and the diversity of violas and violins in emotion response (seriously I should have stuck with theatre majoring or film studies). My whole night turned around. I love it when I can discuss things I love with other people who love them. It's like when someone gets me talking about music, only the people who understand music the way that I do pay attention, cuz they get it. So now my brothers are watching League of Extraordinary Gentlemen and I am in a much better mood and editing pictures from Oceanside so I can post them. The night turned out pretty okay.

Tomorrow = Bowling for which I am very excited. Funny story, I can't bowl well unless I'm drunk. Don't ask how I know that. There was a night, I was in England, spinal cancer, taxi rides, stolen bowling shoes, rubbing alcohol, McDonald's bathrooms, mile long walk into town..... Good times to say the least. Also I should *fingers crossed* have an Etsy update on Sunday.

Oh and hey if it crosses your mind, please pray for my sister Bri. She's got tonsillitis and has had it for two weeks now and it's not getting better. I'm playing nurse (my mom would be proud of all my homeopathic remedies) and making her sleep, but she's in alot of pain. As the very wise Fraser said: "siblings don't really like it if their siblings are in pain. Or getting beat up. That sucks too."

March 26, 2009


Item A:
Baby shower cards are the stupidest things ever. Talk about a trip to Sappsville.
Item B:
I shouldn't never be allowed to do the baby shower shopping, because I'm far too cynical to be let loose around baby items.
Item C:
I don't care if I don't have a kid. You're both younger than me, and I have farrrrrr more child experience than either of you two.
Item D:
I forgot how much I love tacos. If you ever get a chance to have real Mexican tacos, please do, you won't be disappointed.
Item E:
I want to die on the beach in the Oceanside Harbour. It is the most beautiful and peaceful place in the world.
Item F:
San Diego will always be my home. I miss it.
Item G:
No one does Sunsets like California, don't even try to argue.
Item H:
Pictures of the Oceanside/San Diego adventure will be posted tomorrow. Don't miss it!
Item I:
I need to move away from Riversdie (no that is not a typo)
Item J:
New stuff in the store on Sunday! Be there or be square. Also I finally got around to setting up the policies, and other helpful info.
Item K:
Saturday = Bowling!
Item L:
If I have to hear one more thing about what pregnancy does to you, I'm probably going to go postal.
That's it. Weird week.
I hate baby showers.

Be sure to check out the store!

March 21, 2009

Monday Inspiration Station #3

Today has been a particularly Monday-ish Monday. Anyone else counting down the hours till it's Tuesday? Ignore me, because I'm in a bad mood. I had a horrible day yesterday and it was all of my own doing, so now I'm mad, and sour, and kinda think I deserve a punch in the face. So I very much needed pretty, pretty things to inspire me. Here's what I came up with:
Some one please whisk me away on a road trip.
I've always wanted to just grab a bag, jump in a car, and go. Let's do it.

Favourite colour combo: check. Parasol: check. Beautiful dress: check. Dreamy expression: check. Pictures that give me a story when I first see them are few and far between. But this one gave me an instant story in my head. How lovely would it be to sit out on a terrace at sunset looking glamorous?

Dear Zooey,
Please be my friend and let me raid your closet?
Love, Ashley.
There are some things I love. They are these: Cloche Hats (I even have one in tan!), Mustard yellow, beautiful coats, and dark red lipstick. This is the perfect marriage of all those things.

I'm a sucker for pictures with grass. I really love grass. I also love balloons and the colour blue.
Let's all fly away like a balloon, shall we? If you've not seen it, you should watch the movie Danny Deckchair. It's really a wonderful movie.
I have no idea where this image is from.

Wise words I promise to live by:
"The homemaker often makes the big mistake of thinking she does not have to look her best when doing her daily chores. Actually, ill-fitting clothes lower her morale and make her less able to cope with everyday trials. This doesn't mean she has to dress up, but it does mean that she should look neat and trim.If you look well and feel comfortable in slacks or shorts, wear them when working in the home. But be sure you look well in them and that they fit properly. A simple shirtwaist dress or wrap-around with flared or pleated skirt will often present a much more attractive appearance and be just as comfortable as pants."Taken from McCall's Sewing in colour, ISBN 0 600 02457 1 first published 1964.
Quote and image found at Gladys Gladrags

Tablecloth Chic.

Meet my new dress. Her name is Florence. We call her Flo for short. Speaking of flow, I had the most awkward conversation with some of the people in my office this past week when I asked for some Motrin or midol. I'll spare you the details, but just know that old ladies have no propriety when it comes to these things. But anyways.

I made the dress myself. It's not perfect (<--- a="" as="" but="" cute="" far="" from="" href="" is="" it="" perfect="" pretty="" read="" s="" the="" this="" very="">tablecloth fabric
mentioned before by the by. I really, really love how it turned out. I have at least two and a half yards of the stuff left. I was thinking about a matching bag or headband or something, but I'm afraid that will look a little too "matchy-matchy" to quote Heidi Klum. Maybe I'll just make a skirt or a top or something. Pillows would actually be cool in this, not that I have a need for pillows, but whatever.

This is another built by wendy pattern. It's supposed to have ties at the cuffs, but I didn't like the way they looked. Oh and you can probably tell I actually put the sleeves on. Turns out I'm just an idiot and sewed the whole dern sleeve up when it was supposed to be open so you could, y'know, like, attach it to the dress. Once I figured this out the sleeves magically fit me. My only real issue with this dress is the length. I like mini dresses, but man this thing is MINI! when you sit in it, it doesn't exactly cover all my hiney. Thus the tights are necessary.

I look a little Stepford Wife-ish here...
Chelsea found her SD card full of pictures from our trip to Portland last summer. OMG. I was so friggin fat! It's funny because I look in the mirror and go, "oh glory, poop, I've got a long way to go!", but then I saw those pictures and was like "Holy frocking Saturnalia, I've come a long way!" it was slightly pleasing. Wanna compare for yourself? See the above pic and compare to this:

My favourite thing is how excited Delaney and Eric look in this.
Every item of clothing I am wearing in these photos have since been given away because they were too big. So that's kinda awesome. Go me.
Oh and for your viewing pleasure, here is a story about my littlest sister Grace, while I crack up. This video was made for charissa at 2 am. That faint popping noise is my thoat opening and closing while I laugh. It's a thing I tried to do in voice lesson and never could, but I can do it when I'm laughing really hard. Go figure... That is Bri, who is sick telling the story.

March 20, 2009

It both scares and amuses me how sometimes things turn out exactly as I imagine them.
I have a frightfully good imagination. As well as a penchant for knowing outcomes before they happen. I don't believe in psychics, but I do have a weird theory about time. Time is facinating to me. I think it has to do with all the Madeline l'Engle I read growing up.
If things are going to go the way I see them, then I've got alot of time to wait.
I always knew there was a reason I am so patient and calm.

I want to wake up to this song every day

March 19, 2009

Spring for a day.

Let me tell you about today:

The perfect day, the perfect week.

Beauty near the garage

Bushes that need trimming.

A clean and cool pool.

New growth.

The first rose of summer

Life among winter's decay (<--- would be a great name for a punk rock band)

Spring in Suburbia

Sky as blue as the Pacific Ocean.

The trees are blooming

Sunset in Suburbia

Blue Skies at San Juan Capistrano Mission

San Juan Capistrano Mission
How's spring looking for you?

March 18, 2009

Ashley's Guide to Talking on the phone, or reason #7,283 why I hate my job.

Have you ever woken up one morning and thought, "aww poop, this day is just not going to be what I had hoped it would be." ? That was me this morning. I woke up late. I blame my father for this. See he's a lawyer so I have a natural propensity to arguing and generally if given enough time I can win almost any argument, with just my charm and good looks (I'm joking of course(mostly)). So when my alarm went off this morning I argued with myself about whether I should get up or not. It went something like this:

Ashley: Come lazy bones, get up. You need to shower and get dressed and look fabulous. What if today is the day that Rob Pattinson, Larry Mullen Jr., Sean Connery, and Kevin Bacon walk into your office by happenstance. Go look beautiful darling.

Ashley: It's dark out still.

Ashley: So? There is a price to be paid for looking good. Come on get up! You heard me say Kevin Bacon right?

Ashley: I heard you, now shut up, I'm trying to sleep. Besides there's no chance that all those men would walk into the office today. Riverside couldn't handle that much hotness in one place.

Ashley: True, holy Kracow Riverside sucks. Did you see the line of smog yesterday.

Ashley: yeah, it was bad. And think if I get up and go on my merry way, I'll have to breathe that in, and you know how precious our lungs are to us.

Ashley: Oh wow, I never thought of that. We should get a gas mask or something.

Ashley: Good idea, you think about that. I'm gonna go back to sleep.

It was a little Smeagol-ish to be talking to myself as I laid in bed, but like I said, I'm very good at arguing. So then I had to get up and rush getting ready. I didn't get any coffee and haven't had any for two days, which is probably why I've been the slight grouch I've been. I haven't been all that grouchy, just annoyed I guess. I hate telephones. I really hate telephones. I've never liked talking on the phone, not even as a teenager. I had one girlfriend who I once talked for two and a half hours on the phone with except it was her who did most the talking and it was about all her Christmas gifts. I'd much rather, email, IM, write, or actually have a face to face conversation with someone than talk on the phone. I hate the part of my job that involves me answering the phone all day. I especially hate it when I have to talk to stupid people. If you ever have to call an attorney's office for any reason, please adhere to these rules:

1. Think about your question before calling. If you call to ask me if what the letter you got from me says is true, I will probably just hang up on you.

2. I don't fix your computer problems. No exceptions.

3. If you whine, we're done talking. (hold on the phone just rang, and it was a hang up.)

4. Don't hang up on me.

5. If I answer your question, don't argue with me. I can't fix your problem, nor do i really want to. I know that sounds mean and harsh, but if you had learned to be responsible and take care of your own problems you wouldn't be talking with me. Also if I answer your question and you don't like it, get over it.

6. If you swear at me, please be ready to meet Sailor Ashley: Dressed like Sailor Moon, but with a potty mouth. I don't take being spoken to like that, so your options are don't talk to me like that, or don't call me. I'm good with either.

7. If you are from India/Pakistan/or any other foreign phone service, learn to speak English. ( please don't be offended by this, but the conversations would be so much quicker if I didn't have to keep asking, "Wait, what?" every two seconds.)

8. YES! I don't give a flying fig if the call is recorded for quality or training purposes. Actually I think that next time I get asked this question I'm going to say no, and just see what happens. Just to mess with them.

9. I am not a lawyer. I don't understand the law, or like it. In fact thinking about it makes me a little suicidal ( I'm soooo joking people!). If you have a legal question, I will write it down and have the attorney call you back. No I can't answer it, no I won't answer it. No I don't care if you're on your only break from work to ask me this. He's not available to talk to you. No, he's really not. Okay he's in the bathroom taking a crap, that's why he can't talk to you. would you like me to walk the phone to the bathroom and stick it under the door, so he can explain legal procedures while on the john? Yeah I didn't think so.

10. If I have laughed when you thank me for doing something, like spend 30 mins on the phone explaining things that are a. common sense, and b. we've already talked about, and I say "Not a problem" or "no problem!", it was a problem.

But I promise I'm not all doom and gloom, I promise. I have a really yummy cup of coffee in front of me in a mug my dad bought for me out of the kindness of his heart at Disneyland.

The Cheshire Cat is my all time favourite Disney Character. I think it has to do with his absurdity. And yes I was on facebook.

Plus I've got tomorrow to look forward to. It's my day off! Usually I take Tuesdays off, but my sister and I traded so she could study for her final which is today, so good luck Bri! It's apparently pretty bad-ass as far as finals go. She also has a final on Saturday. SATURDAY. Isn't there a law against that or something? But anyways. So I get to take off tomorrow. The plans involve these: Gardening, biking, sewing, cleaning, laundry, music making, and a very large field I discovered while driving aimlessly the other night. Lots of awesome photo ops. And then of course next week is Charissa and Bri's spring break, which will involve some beaching, some scrap booking, some adventures of the ridiculous variety, and maybe, just maybe Disneyland? I don't know.

I have the hankering to go somewhere. Like away, far-ish away. On a vacation. And have an adventure, which involves becoming wrapped up with international jewel hiesters, and a rather dapper man named Philip. Philippe works too. It's time to break out my summer movie list. Somehow most of this list is Hayley Mills films. Moon Spinners, Summer Magic, Parent Trap, That Darn Cat. Yup all with Hayley Mills and all at the top of my summer movie list. I'm so excited to watch these movies, it's pathetic, but I think it will soothe my need for a far off place.

I'm not sure why, but all the adds on my email just changed to being in Japanese/Chinese characters. The adds are usually in reference to the email's subject. The email was my best friend telling me about how at school everyone thinks she had 8 siblings and two sets of parents, because we consider each other family (this is what nearly 17 years of best friendship does to you), So I don't know what the crap all that is about, but I find it very humorous. however I haven't had much coffee in the last two days, so I should probably not trust my idea of what's funny and what's not. The web address given for the ad is I'm trying to decide if it's Tri Pleasure, or Trip Leasure. I'm kinda hoping it's the later.

It's Chipotle Wednesday. Eat well and live long.

March 17, 2009

I'd rattle something off in Gaelic, but I'm very tired today


I love this holiday so much, and yet no one has done anything about it today at work. I'm the only one wearing any obviously visible green, no decorations, no Celtic music (I'm play U2 to make up for that (also if I hear one person say Sel-tic instead of Kel-tic I'm gonna scream! It's Kel-tic folks! Sel-tics are a basketball team)). It's highly depressing. So this is me today. Sorry about the horrible pic. I was in the office when this was taken and yes my skirt is a dark green.

So in honor of this lovely holiday here are some of my favourite pictures from my trip to Ireland in 2004. Enjoy. Also if you hear me singing a million Irish tunes today, don't hate me like my co-workers.
Cliffs of Moher. Most beautiful place of earth!

View of Ireland from the top of Blarney Castle. The Irish claim they have 40 shades of green in their landscape. I miss this.

That opening is the Blarney Stone. You have to lay on your back and lean backwards and kiss it. This little retard kissed it before me and he spit all over it. His name (no joke) was Rick O'Shea. He was a retard.

More Cliffs of Moher. I couldn't get enough.

Me at the Cliffs of Moher. It was so windy I had to take my hat off because it almost blew off into the Atlantic Ocean. And I'm wearing sandals by the by.

St. Patrick's Cathedral, Dublin. Around the corner from here I was accosted by Gypsies. No joke. Real, muslim, romanian Gypsies. They told us they took credit cards. Best day of my life.
The Irish White House. Look Familiar?

This is PJ, our bus driver. He liked me alot. He and our English Leader would fight over weather my name was a proper British name, or Irish. I think that by this argument we established that I had the world's whitest name ever. He looks like a leprechaun here.

I always forget the name of this place. The Burren? Basically it's limestone plateaus left over from the ice age intermixed with patches of grass. It goes on for miles and it actually very beautiful.

We were riding on a duck (it's not spelled like that. It's those things they used in WWII that could float on water like a boat then roll onto the ground and drive like a tank) And stopped by this. It was Dublin. It was perfect. It's Guinness If you didn't know.

So in Ireland it's illegal to cut down these bushes. Why? Legend has it that this is where the Little People live. Under these bushes. This one was holding up a freeway construction.

And finally Blarney Castle. I swear I found a secret passage way there. And yes I did crawl into it and yes there were rats. It was outside and I'm pretty sure I'd have found treasure or something if we hadn't had to leave. We only got to explore a fraction on the grounds. They're really, really amazing.
Have a very happy and SAFE St. Patrick's Day! I'll be spending mine with some Roast, Calcannon, A Guinness cake, and Darby O'Gill (But mostly I'll be watching the verrrrry fine Sean Connery)!